Developing confidence – 10 every day practical tips to boost your self esteem

by | Self-Understanding

Many of my clients tell me they lack confidence, try these 10 practical tips for developing confidence

  1. Say stop to your inner critic

We all have an inner critic. The voice that tells us that we can’t do something, that we are too fat and look far older than our friends. Say STOP and change it with something else remind yourself of your smooth skin, your ability to listen well to friends. This negative voice is not your friend.

  1. Wear your killer outfit

We all have at least one outfit that makes us look fantastic the colour suits, it flatters our shape, and we know it makes people say wow! So anytime that confidence is important make sure you wear one of your favourite and flattering outfits. And ditch the outfits that are out of date, too tight or itchy. You will never feel great wearing clothes like that!

  1. Smile

Go into a new situation with a smile on your face. When you smile it radiates across your whole face, and people are likely to smile back at you. You will look approachable; people will want to talk with you, and you are at least halfway there!

  1. Understand your strengths

What are you good at? Do more of it where do you struggle? Do less of it. Our confidence takes a knock every time we fail. Just because a friend makes a perfect soufflé or type of cake it doesn’t matter that yours doesn’t match up. Have just a couple of things you are good at your signature recipes perhaps and focus on these me? It’s my legendary trifle!

  1. Be up for a challenge

Trying something new and finding that you are good at it can be a real boost. You have the time to take up a new hobby so try something you have never done before use an iPad, join a book club, Nordic walking and aim for a reasonable level of competence. You will get excited and have something new to talk about.

  1. Remember your successes

Youve had masses of success from learning to walk and read to passing your driving test and raising a child. Any time you have doubts about your ability think about the things you have achieved. It really helps to make a list in a notebook, on your phone, so you can refer to it again and again. Read and appreciate each and every one.

  1. Handle mistakes and failures in a more positive way

When we get it wrong, we can keep returning to our mistakes. We should have dealt with a family member differently if we had there wouldn’t have been the rift. Or perhaps we keep replaying what we said or didn’t say at a party. Be your own best friend. You wouldn’t keep on at a friend, and if your friend spoke like you speak to yourself you would remind them about their good points and look for practical ways to address this. There is always a learning point from every situation.

  1. Spend more time with supportive people (and less time with destructive people)

Some people love to bring us down. They are worse than our inner critic. They tell us over and over not to do something, that we are too old, not intelligent enough, that it will all go wrong. They rain on our parade! Choose to spend less time with people who are unsupportive of your dreams or goals and more time with positive, people who encourage you.

  1. Set a small goal

You don’t need to focus on large goals, aim for something small and achievable. Maybe to start counting steps and aiming to increase by 500 a day till you reach the 10,000 steps level you don’t have to do it all in one go. Or to drink a glass of water as soon as you wake. Once you achieve it you have a success so write it down (see point 6) and work on your next small goal.

  1. Fake it until you make it

How would a confident person walk, talk, hold their body? Find your inner actor and act as if you are confident. Once you act in a particular way, you walk tall with shoulders back and smile, you will find you feel much more confident on the inside too.

Related Posts
Relationships

The Caregiver’s Toolkit: Essential Admin Strategies for Supporting Ageing Parents

Sometimes caregiver roles flip with becoming a caregiver to our parents as they get older. At this time, he or...
Read More
Longer Term

How to Care for Your Elderly Parents on a Busy Schedule

Caring for elderly parents is a noble and often challenging responsibility, especially when balancing a busy schedule. Whether you're managing...
Read More
Longer Term

Adapting Your Home to Meet the Needs of Aging Loved Ones

Adapting your home to meet the needs of aging loved ones is essential for ensuring their comfort, safety, and independence....
Read More
Longer Term

The Importance of Creating Lasting Memories

Creating lasting memories with loved ones is one of the most cherished aspects of life. We often find ourselves reminiscing...
Read More
Longer Term

Planning a Memorable Farewell: A Guide to Arranging a Funeral

Arranging a funeral is an emotional and often overwhelming process. It requires careful planning and consideration to ensure that the...
Read More
Retirement

Tick it Off Your Bucket List

As we get older, it's essential to start thinking about the future and getting our affairs in order. This isn't...
Read More
Retirement

3 Ways To Improve Your Quality of Life After Retirement

Image credit Retirement, a phase of life that can be a welcome change for those who have worked their entire...
Read More
Retirement

3 Retirement Tips To Live Your Best Life

Retirement should be something everyone looks forward to. It’s where you can sit back and do what you want without...
Read More
Positive Ageing

Don’t Let These 6 Things Stop You Living Your Best Life as You get Older

Aging: it’s not for the faint-hearted, but let’s be honest, the alternative is worse. As the years tick by, it's...
Read More
Turning 60

20 benefits to getting older

Reduced fear of failure: With age, we often become more resilient and less afraid of taking risks or trying new...
Read More
Self-Understanding

We should act from compassion

There is something about spending time with Buddhist teachers; they radiate calmness and happiness.  I always feel more at peace....
Read More
Money Retirement

Getting your state pension

Early May, about 4 months before I reach my 66th birthday I received a letter, inviting me to claim for...
Read More
Inspiration Retirement Self-Understanding

Letting go ….

Do we need all our possessions? When we travel – do we travel light? We spend a lifetime collecting possessions....
Read More
Elderhood Longer Term

Life at 80 – how AI will change our future

Let's imagine my future. In less than 15 years I'll be 80! Introduction In the year 2038, as you turn...
Read More
Health & Wellbeing

Improving Health Span: The Key to a Long and Healthy Life

As I review the health chapter of my forthcoming book, I was reminded about the difference between health span and...
Read More
Retirement

The Mental Health Benefits of Working Beyond Retirement Age

Retirement is often associated with a well-deserved break from work and a chance to enjoy leisure time. However, research suggests...
Read More
Positive Ageing

Positive Ageing

Positive ageing is “the process of maintaining a positive attitude, feeling good about yourself, keeping fit and healthy, and engaging...
Read More
Retirement Self-Understanding

What is a meaningful life?

A meaningful life can be defined as a life that has a sense of purpose, fulfilment, and significance. It is...
Read More
Elderhood Retirement

On turning 90

My mum has recently turned 90, she is now old-old. She is still living independently with the help of carers...
Read More
Ageism Health & Wellbeing Retirement

Stay engaged and involved to increase your well-being

Research from the Sloan Centre on Aging & Work at Boston College has found that when older adults are actively engaged in...
Read More

Let’s start to get to know each other.

I’d love to send you a series of articles to get you thinking of your wider life. You will also receive my mid-week 50+ update and the Amazing People newsletter.
Denise Taylor

Chief Inspiration Officer, The 50 Plus Coach.