Developing confidence – 10 every day practical tips to boost your self esteem

Many of my clients tell me they lack confidence, try these 10 practical tips for developing confidence

  1. Say stop to your inner critic

We all have an inner critic. The voice that tells us that we cant do something, that we are too fat and look far older than our friends. Say STOP and change it with something else remind yourself of your smooth skin, your ability to listen well to friends. This negative voice is not your friend.
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Customised CV

You need a customised CV. However good your CV, it still need adapting for each job.
To set yourself up for success in your job search, you will need a customised CV and make minor adjustments to tailor your CV to each specific job you are targeting.
Start by copying your CV and renaming it like this: YOUR_NAME-Company_Name.doc
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Reflection – Love After Love

I’d love to share a poem with you, with the words below. This poem by Derek Walcott is read by Tom Hiddleston and the background music and images enhance the words. Through this poem we are reassured that all will be well in the end. The time will come when, with elation you will greet yourself arriving at your own door, in your own mirror and each will smile at the other’s welcome, Continue reading

“You will love again the stranger who was your self.”

Going through a breakup – of a marriage or a long term relationship you need to focus on you, to become happy with the person you are. It’s a way of healing. And this is what I did. It was important for me to learn to love me; to be happy with who I am before I could contemplate a relationship with someone new. I’d love to share a poem with you, with the words below. This poem by Derek Walcott is read by Tom Hiddleston and the background music and images enhance the words. Through this poem we are reassured that all will be well in the end. The time will come when, with elation you will greet yourself arriving at your own door, in your own mirror and each will smile at the other’s welcome, Continue reading

Online Dating part 3

It’s a while since I’ve written about dating.

Read Part 1 here

Read part 2 here

It’s a very strange world. I’ve realised that there are many people out there who have no intention of meeting up the messaging goes on and on and they are probably married or in a relationship. Perhaps some are just too scared to meet.

I remember learning this fact from a webinar with the head of the dating industry group. It’s from Bumble but believed to be typical – Over 60% of people doing online dating are already in a relationship and are there for an emotional ego boost, women as well as men. Apparently if the person you are messaging online hasn’t given you their phone number within 48 hours, they are married.
https://theideaslab.wistia.com/medias/ew2banb2rg
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You can get a job at 50+

People of all ages can struggle to get another job. When we are out of work, and need a job NOW, it is even more difficult.
When we are very committed to an outcome it comes through, people can feel and hear your desperation. It is when we want anything that we need to step back from the outcome. Same for people desperate for a relationship and going through online dating.
I read articles about people who have struggled to get a job at 50+. People who say they have applied for hundreds of jobs, applying for 20+ a week. Several a day.
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How to make the most of your retirement

I regularly get asked to comment in articles incuding how to make the most of your retirement

One was on – how to make the most of your retirement and quotes from me include:
The act of being prepared for retirement is also something that Denise ofAmazing Peoplerecommends. Denise is a career and life coach, and also the chief inspiration officer atThe 50Plus Coach. She says that retirement should not be seen as an end but a new beginning. Denise spoke to us about how important it is to start thinking about retirement early:
Start thinking now, and think about your wider life you will have an extra 2,000 hours a year, how do you want to spend them? Do you want to start a new hobby, go back to work, to do a job you love, focus on volunteering or devote time to a sport or hobby? Get thinking of all the things that you would like to do. Also, think about where you want to live. Do you want to downsize or right size? Maybe a move from the country to a town or city.
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Getting older

I’m no longer reading womens’ magazines. Yet again seduced by the offer of getting 3 issues of a glossy monthly for 1 pound, I signed up for 3. My mum likes them but WHAT IS THE POINT. Too many articles focused on looking good, expensive clothes and ads for expensive skin care.

Too much plays on our insecurity.

Many articles focus on women who look great for their age. Good Housekeeping has an article on Davina McCall. I read something recently on Carole Vorderman. There are numerous actors, but it is their job to stay within accepted views of beauty. And who is it that says we need to conform to a stereotype anyway.

Does it matter if I look my age?

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We need to be creative

Creativity is vital to thrive as we grow older.

What impact does that have on you? Do you see yourself as a creative person or do you think you lack any signs of this?
So let us look at some of the key suggestions from an article by Stan Goldberg – Four Creativity Strategies to Recharge an Aging Brain
First, creativity does not mean being an artist. We dont need to produce a work of art. Adapting a recipe can still build new neural connections.
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Are you a late bloomer – be inspired by these women

I’ll be 62 late August, and still have lots of energy, and enthusiasm for life. I’m only just beginning! My life so far has brought me to where I am today.

Never think you are too old; there are plenty of inspirational people out there. Yesterday I saw an article in The Washington Post

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10,000 Steps A Day? How Many You Really Need To Boost Longevity

ALLISON AUBREY
New research shows that daily light walking is important for maintaining health as you age. But if you can’t hit 10,000 steps, don’t worry.
There’s nothing magical about the number 10,000.
In fact, the idea of walking at least 10,000 steps a day for health goes back decades to a marketing campaign launched in Japan to promote a pedometer. And, in subsequent years, it was adopted in the U.S. as a goal to promote good health. It’s often the default setting on fitness trackers, but what’s it really based on?
“The original basis of the number was not scientifically determined,” says researcher I-Min Lee of Brigham and Women’s Hospital.
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